Hypersensitivity

I saw this picture today:

I wish I could ask each of you what "Highly Sensitive" or "Hypersensitivity" means to you

if you want to answer in the comments, please do....

because it is this picture for me. I notice small changes in body language, fluctuation in tone, articulation, facial expressions... all of it. 

I'll often refer to my Hypersensitivity as being an HSP, which is a Highly Sensitive Person, and I will often use Elaine N. Aron as a reference. Aron has written many books on HSPs and has done more research than I feel I will ever be able to read through in my lifetime.

I will make a more education based post on HSP later, but for now, here is how we discovered my Hypersensitivity:

I got diagnosed with my Hypersensitivity around the age of 12 - I was definitely in middle school. I kept getting sick -beginning back in elementary school- and it was causing me to miss more school than I'd like to admit, then the stress of missing school would make me sick....

It was a vicious circle and it really wasn't fun to be in. 

The weird part is, when I was sick, I wouldn't have a fever, no vomiting or anything. My stomach would hurt like crazy, I'd be tired, overly sensitive, have a headache, feel like all I could do is cry and have body aches. Luckily, I have an amazing mother who listened. 

After a bit of not knowing what was going on, and my doctor having no idea, I ended up on a comfy couch in a psychologist's office. Well before the comfy couch, I was in a small dark room in an office chair while I took a really annoying and stressful test on a computer. But after the results came back, the psychologist told my mom and I that I was Hypersensitive. 

I will never forget how he explained it to young me:

"Typically a person's emotions range from 1 to 10, with Hypersensitivity you times that by 1000 and it doesn't have a stopping point".

I was getting sick because I was feeling bullied, unwanted, and dumb.

Middle school was ROUGH for me!

We finally knew what was going on.

I saw the psychologist for a few sessions because I had a lot to process that had happened and was happening in my life, and there became an ah-ha moment that really changed my life:

because I pick up on changes in voice, I would hear the anger in my mom's voice when she was upset and would take it as her yelling at me. This would cause me to totally shut down, I would cry and feel sick to my stomach. Then like clockwork, 2 to 3 days later, I'd be sick, body aches, headache... the works.

This changed my life because I feel if my mom hadn't listened to me and gotten the help I needed, her's and my relationship would not be what it is today because after she found out that I heard her as yelling at me, she worked with me to find different ways to communicate.

We found writing me a list or writing notes to be the best tactic.

My dad and I had a harder time figuring out how my hypersensitivity worked in our relationship. Neither of us are confrontational, but because of my hypersensitivity I can come off as very confrontational as my emotions peak. This made it really hard sometimes to get my feelings, thoughts and opinion across. My dad had to learn to listen to me through the tears and I had to learn to not let the quiet come off as anger. 

So, that is how we discovered my Hypersensitivity. 

Hypersensitivity is sometimes genetic or sometimes brought on by trauma, I believe that I was born with mine as I had always been called "sensitive" and was seen to cry a lot over things (both sad and happy tears). I was always closer to my emotions, even at a young age. 

There are times where I truly hate being an HSP because I do take things to heart and then some, but as bad as the bad times are, the good are 1000 times better... and because of those good days, I wouldn't change being an HSP for the world.

So, what's next;